WILL THERAPY HELP ME?

Of course it will! …if You will! We as therapists are here to support you in your own efforts to understand and make sense of yourself. We are much less here to judge or suggest behaviors, even the obviously self-destructive ones. So the first thing that will help you is You, your will to understand, your will to be honest with yourself, and your will to be vulnerable in front of someone. We are, generally speaking, experts in accepting the wide spectrum of possibilities in being and behaving in the world. I am an expert in understanding you in the context of your culture/s, understanding how your childhood is still affecting you, and picking out with you strategies that will move you forward. 

All of these things put together will almost surely make therapy work for you or your loved one, but then… there are also the very deeply ingrained patterns of self-sabotage many therapies fail to rectify, because those require a degree of acceptance of the unknown, and a long-term commitment that will alone cannot provide. To illustrate, I had a client recently contacting me because of their addiction to hard drugs. They wanted me to help them figure out things, but their primary need was for an anti-depressant prescription. They had tried lots of things before, including clinical rehab, but nothing had worked. I felt I could help, but they would have come for counseling only if I could prescribe medication. I don’t prescribe medication, I am not licensed to do so, so we had to forgo psychological work too. I couldn’t give this client what they wanted, and they couldn’t face the uncertainty of this huge question mark that hangs over their selves, and why they do what they do despite wanting very much the opposite. Therapy didn’t help because  the fear of not immediately knowing the why of things keeps many either out of the counseling room, or worse, in the counseling room but with no way forward. My counseling competence can often compensate for this, I have a good track record behind me, but not a perfect one! I have lost clients, and I have lost them because they could not face their own uncertainty anymore, and I couldn’t sooth them quickly enough for them to come to see their own way forward. So will therapy work for you? It’s a subtle question, but if you have the will, that’s the perfect place to start.

Wishing You Well,

Your Shrink in Bansko